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Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Women I love - Part III

This post is part of my Women I Love series. Read more about it here


Successful women deserve celebration. I'm not talking about success in it's traditional, narrow definition. I'm talking about women that determine what they want out of life and put in the work to make that happen. This seems like the theme of my little Women I Love series. 

I often struggle with my box as a woman. Though I identify with many of the cultural stereotypes and expectations of my gender,my blood boils when I feel constrained by what I should be "focusing on" at this point in my life. I hate the questions about babies and boyfriends and mortgages. I feel frustrated that I don't move forward at work simply because of my female status. I want to hate fashion and baking because I think that I should spend more of my energy on things that matter, whatever that means. 

Women like Beyonce prove that I need not fret too much about how everything is going to come together. She seems to have spent her time and energy on whatever she most wanted in that moment. She gave her everything to Destiny's Child, her solo career, her marriage, taking over her management and, these days, motherhood. 

I know there are trade-offs to it all. I acknowledge that it's always going to be hard to find balance as a women in this culture, no matter what stage I find myself in. 

What I'm taking away from this little writing series on Women I love is that I find myself so afraid of having to make those difficult choices that I avoid making a choice at all. 

I'm scared to be funky and fearless and relentless in the pursuit of my dreams because I'm afraid to fail. I'm also afraid that it's not the right thing for me. That, somehow, I'll find myself on the path I've always wanted and then determine that I didn't really want that at all. I'll be looking around for the stable, boring desk job again and complaining about the frustrations of the life I've carved for myself. 

Here's the thing: I'm done with the worries. They just bring me down. 

I'm going to continue to go for my writing career and put my everything into building this blog. I see what I want for myself very clearly and I'm going to go for it. A la Nicki Minaj, I know what I want, so GET OUT THE WAY. 

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